by Frank Honess
August 17, 1999 is what I call my “spiritual birthday,” marking the day 14 years ago that Jesus came into my life. But, truth be told, I didn’t begin walking into the light from my darkness until August of 2009–a full ten years later. Having dealt with an addiction to porn for twelve years of my life, I found that for many years I only “thought” that I had really given my life to Christ and begun to trust him.
But I hadn’t gone all the way.
Whether it’s a porn addiction or another heart issue, choosing to trust God completely doesn’t come in one single decision–it comes in a series of decisions that you make on a daily basis, decisions which then translate into actions lived out in your life.
I discovered that it wasn’t enough to simply “claim” Jesus as my Savior, because I was “following” Jesus and yet was still addicted to porn! I really wasn’t ready to fully surrender because in truth, I still enjoyed my sin way too much to trust God with it.
Fast forward to 2009. I began to change my decisions, which began to change my behaviors, which began to change me. If anything, in the last four years of my life, I’ve found that trusting God IS risky. Being vulnerable and trusting other men IS risky. Why? Because Jesus promises us that NOTHING will be the same when our hearts, minds, and our lives are completely His.